These 2 weeks have been a revelation in itself, particularly the man that I married, and his new role as a father.
I’ve always told D that he will be a good father but he never is sure of that; maybe it’s cos of the regrets D had for not being able to show his dad what he has achieved. I know there is a part in D that he wishes he had the time and the opportunity to say lots to his dad. On the 2nd day of TJ’s birth, when the nurse wheeled TJ into my room, D carried him and was so overwhelmed by the feelings that his dad will not get the chance to see and touch TJ.
Now that D has been thrown into fatherhood, for real, given that TJ is born, D has been very much a hands-on dad. From carrying TJ, watching over TJ when I need to express my milk in the dead of the night, changing the diapers & wiping TJ’s arse, playing with TJ and calling him his “Handsome Boy” and “Poopy Boy” (depends on the situation), staying up with me during the late-night feeds, warm up the expressed milk or prepare the formula, sterilised all that TJ uses… and the list continues. I know it hurts him to be away from TJ (and me) when he returns to HK. And it scares me that late at night, I am all alone with a bawling baby. I wish the arrangement could be much better, in fact, I didn’t think such separation will be so difficult.
So, we are back to our respective responsibilities and duties for the next 4 weeks, D with his work and I with taking care of our lil’ one. At least one of us will be getting a good night’s sleep. 🙂