Date of Birth: 16 Sept 2007 @ 12.18 p.m. @ Thomson Medical Centre
(Shares the same b’day as our MM LKY)
Birth Weight: 2.485 kg
Length: 46 cm (both parents are not really very tall)
I had just taken a shower last Saturday night, 15 Sept, when I felt my waterbag burst and that there was blood in it. Realising that this wasn’t a good sign, I called the emergency no. and spoke to my gynae, who told me to get myself admitted to TMC.
At 11pm, my mum and I reached TMC, and although I was not experiencing any contractions at that time, I continued to have my show. After all the necessary checks by the delivery ward nurses and later by my gynae, I was 1.5cm dilated and at the threshold of another stage in my life.
Anyway, the contractions started about 12.30am, and I tried to tahan the different stages throughout the night… the explosive contractions that came in waves to remind you that they are there to “break” the lower back and dismember the pelvis, and the draggy ones that tear thru’ the back downwards to my upper thighs. After 9h of this and thinking that using the gas will dull the pain, I decided to just go for the epidural at 9am on Sunday morning, 16 Sept, which finally gave me the break I needed. I was already tired out battling the contractions and I could somewhat just get some shut-eye.
D managed to get the 11am Jetstar flight on Sunday morning, and I was hoping that he would be back in time for Tyler’s birth. He would tell you that he didn’t get much sleep that Saturday night either as he was afraid that he would miss the flight. Unfortunately he only managed to get to the hospital at 4pm that afternoon. By then, I had of course given birth and managed to nap a couple of hours.
I didn’t think I was excited during the delivery, in fact, as much as I wanted to last till D arrived, I just couldn’t as by 11am, I was already 8cm dilated and I could feel the urge to push. Moreover, I was just too tired and sleepy.
At 1130, with the help of a delivery nurse, I tried to follow her instructions on the right technique to push. However I couldn’t get it right all the time, and became even more tired. The nurse mentioned that she could see TJ’s head but since I wasn’t able to sustain the duration of each push, TJ didn’t make much progress down my cervix.
My gynae finally stepped in to assist in the delivery, and he used this Kiwi Vacuum gadget to “vacuum” TJ out of me. Although I was on epidural and didn’t feel much of the contractions, I definitely felt the Kiwi gadget quite intensely and each push that I mustered feels like I was going to split. Most of the time, I closed my eyes to concentrate on the pushing and when I opened my eyes, I saw a small lil’ face staring back at me, looking equally shocked.
Yeah, that was TJ… and when the nurses placed him on my chest, he just looked at me, and we both shared that brief moment in silence. My only regret… D wasn’t with us. He would have loved to and missing this probably took away some part of him.
I can’t say that I was over the moon with happiness, tears of joy etc… in fact, I actually just wanted to sleep, for a long time. I could barely open my eyes, as I saw brief snapshots of TJ being wrapped up in a brown towel, placed under a warmer for a while, and having him next to me as we were both wheeled to the 5th level ward and nursery.
I should be sleeping now before the next feed at 2am. But I reckoned if I don’t write about this day soon, I am afraid I would forget it and it would a good way to let D know what happened that day.
I was discharged just this afternoon and frankly I am not sure what kinda mum I would be. My major problem now is the breastfeeding issue… insufficient milk, inverted nipples and a frustrated TJ who isn’t getting enough milk from me, hence the need to supplement with formula till my “milk production” kicks in. Hopefully soon. It hurts me to see him struggling to suckle, especially since he is a borderline premmie, light-weight and all.
D has been great feeding TJ with the bottle. He had seen the nursery nurses feeding TJ and tried to duplicate it with great patience. Since TJ is 3 wks early, he tends to be a sleepyhead and would fall asleep during the feeding. D would then have to “wake” him up by blowing on his face or burping TJ and resume feeding. This will go on for a few times, until TJ finishes the amount he requires for that feed. I am not sure if I could do that, when D returns to HK, in fact, D thinks I am too soft on TJ and needs to persist.
For now, I enjoy seeing how D bonds with TJ and in a way, it does hurt to know that reality bites and our lil’ family will have to be separated again after a couple of weeks. But I suppose it isn’t an impossible thing, I did do the impossible by giving birth alone and we are praying hard that TJ will grow up stronger the next couple of weeks so that it will be easier on me when I am on my own, and D will be assured that everything is fine when he leaves.
More photos of our sleepyhead and “Poopy Boy” (as his daddy likes to call him now).