D and I had one of those rare fights which escalated to a major cold war, resulting in separate sleeping arrangements. Thinking about it now, I realised how silly the entire matter came about, and how we let our pride and anger got in the way.
Basically I didn’t agree with D’s reasons for not helping me to install an application on the other notebook, and was upset cos it sounded as if he didn’t want to help me. As for D, he felt that I was being difficult and didn’t accept his reasons; that it wasn’t because he didn’t want to help me but he had offered an alternative anyway.
Later when I saw his point of view and apologised, D didn’t accept it and retorted that I always apologise and don’t seem to take my apologies seriously. That got me really fed up and I asked him what else could I say if I can’t say “sorry”. To me, I felt that it was unfair ‘cos there were times when I accepted his apologies and forget about the matter. How, I asked him, can I ensure that I will not do something wrong, I am not perfect and obviously I have my own opinions and views, be it they might be skewed or weird.
Whenever we are upset with one another, there will not be fiery words or shouting matches, but cold war begins. Thus on Sunday night, I couldn’t go near D thinking he was angry with me, and he thought I was upset with him. We both stayed away from each other, him in the bedroom while I was in the living room. I was hoping D would come out and cajole me or something, but that’s not him. In the end, I slept on the couch after reading the papers. Neither of us slept much that night.
Somehow, we cleared things up yesterday over MSN but it still seemed so weird, this entire episode. Most of the time, we are in sync with one another, but when something like this comes along the way, it hits us suddenly and we wonder what’s up with the other person, how can this person act like this or say things like that, to spite and to hurt. I hate it when we are upset with one another, but I suppose it can’t be helped… it will be odd if there isn’t any disagreements in a marriage.
I was looking for quotes to write on my classroom noticeboard and found one on marriage and thought of D immediately. 🙂
“I think men who have a pierced ear are better
prepared for marriage. They’ve experienced pain
and bought jewellery.” – Rita Rudner